Colt has been wonderful. I still don't think he really "gets" it, but he loves patting Owen, rubbing his head on his side, and giggling when he moves. We made it through our first weekend, which is the true test since Colt is at daycare during the week. It was an easy decision for us to keep him in daycare while I'm on maternity leave. He NEEDS the routine, and I really wanted this time with Owen like I had with Colt for bonding.
I have to say, all that time I worried about whether or not I would feel bonded to Owen, if he could "live up" to all the amazement and feelings I have for Colt...I need not have worried. It was almost immediate how natural it felt to have another baby, how in love I was. I think it's really amazing to have experienced both being a mom through adoption and through pregnancy. The feelings I had those moments both my children were placed in my arms: exactly the same. Amazement, wonder, joy, love, and even being overwhelmed. I'll admit I was relieved that the feelings were the same. I wasn't sure if they would be.
Of course some things are different, the biggest being the physical recovery this time around. However, we are MUCH more relaxed this time around. We're not overanalyzing every cry or poop or sneeze. We're able to move around with much more ease, talk louder, less worry about feeding. So that's been a relief. And I'll be honest when I tell you our nerves and lives are much easier this time around because we don't dread every time the phone rings. Most of you adoptive parents know that feeling. I don't miss that at all.
We'd forgotten how small they are, how snuggly, how delicate. Newborn size diapers are astounding, still. We're just having a blast drinking in the moments. Owen is amazing and beautiful and we feel so blessed that he's here.
I'll post the "birth story" soon. Once I'm completely healed and feel like I can wrap up that ending. I wrote about Colt's birth story, and I can't wait to write about Owen's. After all those months of being very iffy about pregnancy, I'll admit I am completely and totally amazed with what I went through giving birth. Nothing special or out-of-the-ordinary from other births, but still special to me and I want to make sure I write it down for our family.
Hope you enjoy the photos! From coming home in the first pictures, to just this morning. Enjoy.
5 comments:
This made me cry. Your comments about the experiences being the same, that's so beautiful, as are your SONS...I love that extra s on the end there! :)
I am so happy for you--a few years back who would have thought that you'd be the proud mama of not one but two amazing little boys? WOW. I think anyone who's been through the ringer of IF and then adoption can really see the beauty of your story.
Can't wait to hear more about your labor and delivery experiences...it's always so much fun to be a fly on the wall of these stories!
Hugs,
Melba
Such beautiful pictures and you look great. :-D
I'm so happy to hear that both the adoption and the birth were equally as special. As someone adopting and pregnant, that's something that I sometimes worry about. I am confident that I will love my children equally though, just as you do.
Beautiful post. :-D
Colt looks like such a BIG BROTHER now! I can't believe how big he is compared to Owen!
Wow wow wow! This post made me cry! What a great support system you have! I love the sign and the baskets for mama, dada and brother! LOVE it and stealing it!! :)
Welcome home! What a wonderful little family!
I totally get what you are saying. After experiencing the absolute miracle of adoption, the thought of giving birth seemed so mundane to me. Of course, it wasn't although I told my daughter's birth mother that I preferred letting someone else labor and deliver. :)
Congratulations! Both your boys are so precious. BTW, love the newborn survival baskets. I think I may have to copy that one.
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